Thursday, September 8, 2011

photography


I have recently decided to dabble in photography, who isn't right now right? So as a result of this recent hobby interest everyone has become my model. If you are spending any amount of time with me, you have been warned! I spent the day with my younger brother a few weeks ago. We were running errands and had some time to kill. With some begging and hesitation from Cody, I snapped a few pics of him. 


 He's already tired of the modeling session! But for some reason I really like this picture of him. 


I also like this photo of him. He has a sharp profile. Hopefully these are hint of fun hobby ahead!

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Summer, thus far.

This summer has been uneventful, comparatively. The last two summers I have been blessed with incredible opportunities - summer staff, Kanankuk, D-Focus. . . And this summer consists of school. Two long days of two long, almost three hour classes. BUMMER. Oh and also work. Lots of work in the down time. However there is still lots of time on my hands. I mean a lot. In that down time I have found myself really discontent with where I am at geographically and spiritually. I see myself and I am not the person I want to become but why? My conclusion is, among other things, when God created me He created me to be "doer". It is so hard for me to be still and patient, I want to be doing something all the time! That isn't a bad thing necessarily but because I haven't been doing I have been feeling a serious lack of joy. Which is the problem - investing my joy in something other than the gospel of grace. Thus I have been looking at my relationship with God more intently. Do I really find my joy in Him? Do I really believe that the gospel is a reflection of God's radical love for me? No. And no. I don't truly believe those things, I want to desperately. But most days I don't.... 
I think in large that is due to the fact that the gospel is so incredibly radical. You know the story, I don't have to tell you but think about it. I mean really think about it.God loves me (I am filthy with sin.). Jesus dies but He dies because He is perfect in order to exchange my filth for His righteousness. That does not make sense! What! ......... That is radical. Crazy. Incredible. 
The "awe" of that craziness, incredibleness, radicalness, is where I want to live. That is why I have been discontent. Knowing the Truth and yet not being compelled in any way by it's freedom. By it's insane love. By it's passion. When I really look at the cross and what it means for my life, what it does for me (sin for righteousness) I can't help but see how crazy in love God is with His people. I think that is why C.J Mahney said that we are to preach the Gospel to ourselves daily.
So maybe this summer hasn't been as uneventful as it appears after all. . .

Friday, January 28, 2011

procrastination

it is so like me to be a slacker. even with things i love or want to love. there comes a time when i slack off. i am blaming this mostly on the fact that i am a procrastinator to the extreme. take for instance this moment right now, i am writing on this nifty little blog of mine as a way to keep me from studying for neuroscience - what is it about that word that just really sucks? (apologies if you are incredibly passionate about that field of science although i find it hard to comprehend why you would be but that is probably because i find it hard to comprehend neuroscience. that however is an entirely different blog that may or may not pop up as the semester drags on).
so here i am with my neuro book open, hidden under my computer but open nonetheless, struggling to find motivation to continue reading about the workings of the brain. what better way to put off studying than telling you what i have come to find really annoying this semester (besides neuro). the following is a list of items that really drive me crazy:
  • the kid in class that nods at everything the teachers says - literally a nod after every statement. it's just not necessary. even if you do agree with the fact that Pavlov's dogs salivated during the experiment it's ok to not nod. we get it you understand the material. i give you permission to let your neck rest awhile.
  • the person who raises their hand in class and states, "i have a question" before they ask their question. this too is not necessary. we saw you raise your hand and your eyebrows move closer together at the confusion of the topic, no need to clarify that you are indeed confused and would like to ask a question.
  • leaving the tv on when no one is watching it. this one really gets me. i just don't understand why you would not turn it off. if you plan on retiring to your room for a while and your intentions are not to come back, sit down and finish your time on the couch then why leave it on?
  • the teacher who says um, like, and so yeah before each powerpoint slide. i'm going to start a tally on monday, i'll report back the number - you will be shocked.
  • the conversation that goes like this:
me: "hey, how are you?"
person: "good! how are you?"
me: "good (with a bit of a smile. then we part ways)."
let's be real, these are pointless interactions and yet i always seem to have them in passing as i'm walking to class and run into someone i know but don't really talk to that often however it would be rude to not greet them in some way. don't get me wrong i am a social person, i love people, i do, this conversation just bothers me - probably because i initiate it - but i seem to have one of these at least once a day.
  • i will end with this, which may not apply to many people but i will vent to those of you who can appreciate this complaint. buying a sorority shirt - that is mandatory - but not exactly what you pictured when you heard it was "really cute". i hate this mainly because i feel an obligation to wear the shirt for two reasons. 1. i do love my sorority and 2. i support those who designed the shirt but let it be known i would never wear an orange and blue brightly colored "back to school" shirt apart from the mandatory criteria (note: the word mandatory is among my list of dislikes.)
ah. the time has come for this procrastination to end. sad day. however i hope to keep you updated more on the hum drum day to day of this college girl soon. "until then, stay golden" (name that movie!)

by grace,
aut.

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