As you know, best friend - liz (i'm addressing you in this blog because let's be honest for a minute you are the only person who reads my blog as of right now i'm ok with it and you should be too since you are getting special attention right now, this may not happen when my blog BLOWS up and the whole world is hanging on one word at a time! until then......) as you know miss liz ellen, i am in Dollywood. and what an adventure this is. it's unlike any place i have ever been too. there are people who come from all places to venture into this weird world of amusement. i like here alright. i am learning a lot. i think that a lot of times i based my idea of who God is off of what i heard other people say but in our study it says that "the truest thing about God is what He says about Himself" well duh i thought to myself as i read that but then i was like.... well what does He say about Himself?? i didn't really know. for instance sovereignty have i really believed that God is sovereign and if i do what does that mean and look like in my life? i began asking myself these questions and i started to realize - probably because God was bringing it to light - that i claimed to believe a lot but my actions suggest otherwise. of course God is revealing this to me in such a sweet gentlmen like way. His control and power and LOVE for me is much more than anything i can imagine.
with all that in mind this past week i have been feeling a lot of relief. relief from the expectations i put on myself to be the "good" chrisitan (what does that even mean??) or to give God a good reputation. when really God doesn't need me. His unconditional love for His people flows from a place without needs, without expectations, this is what allows Him to love me when i screw up and when i praise Him. He doesn't need my praise, though i'm sure it brings Him joy, He is complete without me and i am free to just seek Him without expectations. ah. sweet relief. my only goal in life is to get to know Him better.
so i encourage you to shed the expectations you have placed on yourself in order to really seek God and who He is. spend time with Him, get to know who He says He is.